I remember when I found out I was pregnant with my first daughter. I was 22. I was living with my future-husband-to-be/baby-daddy’s parents and I was very fortunate to have them! This wreaked havoc on my diet however. I felt so terrible that I had to live with them that I really stayed downstairs a lot because I didn’t want to be a bigger bother than I already was, so I relied on potato chips and cherry coke… a lot.
At a check-up, I remember my doctor telling me that he expected me to gain 20, maybe 30 pounds. I didn’t understand. I remembered my sister mentioning thinking that too when she was pregnant. I mean really, I was 5’5″ stayed consistent at about 120lbs. Where was 30lbs going to go on me? Welp, they added up to a total of 34 lbs. I had my beautiful little lady and nursed for about 4 months, my body tends to not want to drop any lbs while nursing, but when I stopped, it just kind of bounced back!
Next came pregnancy 2. This was 2 years after my first. I was ready, we were trying and I pretty much felt pregnant right away! I did slightly, okay not really any better on my eating habits. I figured my body bounced back once, it’ll do it again! I kept away from those chips and coke, we were in our own house, and I figured I knew my way around being pregnant by now! What a joke! There are only 2 known photo’s of me pregnant with my son. I was absolutely huge. I ate anything I wanted. I wanted to look as pregnant as I felt! Oh, no worries another 34lbs were added, but this time, my body didn’t want to let go even after I finished nursing!
Pregnancy 3 came about unexpectedly. There are only 15.5 months between my son and youngest daughter. (Yes, THAT’s how unexpected it was!) Anyways, since I had gotten so big with #2 I had started working out when he was about 3.5 months old. Daily workouts, paying attention to what I ate, and refocusing!!! I was able to lose 33 lbs in just 9 weeks! The, what do ya know feeling? Pregnancy #3! (insert tears…. here.) Why was this devastating news to me?! Why was I so upset?! It had nothing to do with not wanting another child, It was pure selfishness… I was focused on how for the first time in my life since I was 9 or 10 years old and in gymnastics… I had gotten a six-pack. (No, not of cherry coke!) I am talking definition in my ab.s! This was HUGE for me because I literally was just HUGE! And then there was that “30lb.s, 30lb.s, 30lb.s” ringing in my ears!
With the help of a girlfriend who reminded me that “we are only pregnant, and able to be pregnant for such a short time in our lives…” and letting go of what my three past pregnancies were. (I also had suffered a miscarriage.) I changed my motives to something BEYOND myself. I was still exercising and eating strictly, but it wasn’t because I was scared to lose my abs or gain the “30lb.s”. And, I still had my moments of, “I am so huge!” “I’m never going to be ‘skinny’ again!” “My boobs will never look the same”… but, it became more important for me to embrace my time being pregnant, and not worry so much about the number on the scale, how much cellulite gathered around my thighs, or if I’d ever see those abs I worked so hard for again…
My little one is a blessing. She helped me remember my purpose here. (All of ours are different) Mine, to be a mom. I was given this body to carry children, and to be strong enough spiritually, mentally, and physically to help them discover THEIR purpose!
All of us handle pregnancy differently. I am grateful I choose to EMBRACE my 3rd pregnancy. I encourage you to, it’s amazing, a true honor and gift.
And yes… I gained another 34lb.s with her too!