Everyone has something they are good at. Some people are natural athletes, some people can sing, some can cook, I can say no like a champ. If saying no was an Olympic sport, I would decline a spot on the team. There are only about two situations where I have trouble saying no, one is when someone asks if anyone is ready for another drink, the other I don’t really feel comfortable discussing on such a family oriented website. According to some stuff I’ve read in magazines and the interweb, a lot of ladies have trouble saying no. This makes me scratch my head since I’ve never really grown out of my toddler no phase. Can you help me move? No. Does this look good on me? No. Do you want to try the Jell-O mold? No. Want to hold the baby? Oh hell no. See how talented I am? Because I’m a good kid, I figured I would write a little something to try to help out all you dopes who have trouble dropping no’s. I promise its not that hard, you can do it.
First you need to sit yourself down and have a little chat. If you want to get your health and fitness in order, you’re going to have to say no. There’s no way around it, people are going to offer you crappy food and you have to say no, they’re going to ask you to go places and you have to say no (because you’re going to the gym). I don’t want to get all deep and stuff, but you have the right to say no whenever you want, and you should exercise that right.
Practice makes perfect, so say no as often as possible to get used to it. Just say no all day, even if no one is asking you a question. I’m saying no out loud to an empty room the entire time I’m writing this, is it weird? No.
Realize no’s are like snowflakes, no two are alike. There are so many different no’s you can use; it’s actually kind of special. My son might get a yelled no when he asks if he can do a science experiment 5 minutes before school starts. A work colleague might get a no accompanied by a little fib about how my stomach is bothering me when they ask me if I want a cupcake. Someone might get a rage filled no if they ask me why I’m not dating anyone. A friend will probably get a boozy no if they ask me if I want to get late night Chinese food. I think the biggest thing you need to figure out is who gets a hard, firm no, and who gets a sweeter, softer no thanks, after that its smooth sailing.
Perhaps most importantly, stick to your no’s. If you say no you have to mean it, commit to it and never let anyone turn your no into a yes. I don’t care if your great aunty made that Doritos salad from scratch and its her world famous recipe, no means no. If you’re saying no in the first place I trust you have an excellent reason for not saying yes, trust yourself to know when to say no, and then stand firm baby, you don’t want to be a no flip flopper!
Well those are my tips for saying no, hopefully you take a nugget or two of no wisdom away from the blog and you’re on your way to breaking that annoying people pleasing habit you have. Saying no feels good, and it can even be pretty freeing, especially if you’ve been a yes person your whole life. So next time someone asks to you to do something you really don’t want to do, take a deep breath, look them in the eye and hit them with a no; you might just become a no person yet.