Today marks 12.5 weeks out. I’ve realized that as soon as I committed to competing..I no longer had the same enthusiasm in my training. My husband actually pointed it out to me. I think it may have something to do with being critiqued and judged in a bikini; but I actually think it’s something bigger than that. I think it has to do with the fact that this is the “next step”. Ever since I was young, I craved to be athletic, but being the 70lbs over weight girl you hardly get picked for any team. I remember when I was in the 4th grade my teacher ran outside because she was so proud that I ran a full lap without stopping and she wanted to tell me. I’ve lived with the want to be better for so long..and now prepping for this competition is bringing all that back.
There is such a huge mind game going on that it’s literally fogging up my day. I have to remind myself the reasons why I’m embarking on this journey. I want to compete because I feel that it provides credibility in my approaches to fitness and awareness; it’s always been deep in my heart to help other women who are struggling with the issues I too have had. I want to show them that you can reach your goals, have that body you want, and be everything you desire. Then I remember that I am still also one of those women. As much as I learn, change habits, and teach..I am still one of those women in the core of my being. Doubt continues to say “what if you can’t, what if you don’t.” Contentment tells me “You are great just the way you are, relax and eat a cookie.” Fear says “You’re wasting your time.”
Luckily I believe in a higher power than myself…and I alone am not the means of strength. I find peace in that and can rest easier at night. I have a rooted passion in my heart to help those 4th grade Britney’s to finish that lap; and that voice is louder than the doubt, the contentment, and the fear. That voice’s name is FAITH. It’s easy for us to get stuck where we are, never becoming who we truly want to be because of the doubt, the contentment, and the fear. In my life, one thing has always superseded them and that is faith. Keep believing no matter what you feel that day, because feelings change and the day you feel better is the day you’ll regret giving in to those little words. Don’t let fear, doubt and contentment set you back. Let your FAITH bring you higher!
So that’s what I’ve been focusing on these last few days – believing. I know when girls are prepping for competitions we usually hear about the workouts and the food, but I felt compelled to share with you the mind prep that has incurred. Just like any muscle in the body, it is very important to exercise your mind as well. Stay focused on the positive and detour the negative. Faith trumps fear every time!