Rule 1: If you can wear it to the beach, don’t wear it to work. This might be the most important rule, if you retain nothing else I write retain this. I don’t care how cute your cotton cover-up is, if it can be worn with a big straw hat and flip-flops it can’t be worn to work.
Rule 2 Speaking of flip-flops; don’t ever wear them around the office. It doesn’t matter if they have a wedge heel, flowers, ribbons, rhinestones, whatever. They cheapen your outfit, so don’t.
Rule 3: Watch that ponytail. It’s a million degrees out so of course you’re going to put your hair up (and so am I), but your ponytail should never look ratty. A quick cute fix for a sloppy ponytail is to curl the ends of your hair up with a big fat curling iron. It takes just minutes and makes your hair look 1000 times cuter, I promise.
Rule 4: Give into peer pressure. Take a look around the office; especially at your bosses and those higher on the corporate ladder, what are they wearing? If they’re dressing just as formal in July as they are in January you should be too. If they look like they can go right from the office to golf course its probably safe to dress business casual. BUSINESS CASUAL, not pajama casual, no sweatpants or wife beaters please.
Rule 5: Learn how to apply self-tanner, or leave it to the pros. Last week on the bus, I felt so bad for a young lady sitting across from me, it looked like some little hooligans pelted her with water balloons filled with mud. Then it dawned on me, she wasn’t a victim of a mud attack, she was just incredibly bad at rubbing in self-tanner. There’s no shame in admitting you’re bad at something, I personally am terrible at applying self-tanner and trust my spray tan to the professionals at the Tan Man in South Boston.
Rule 6: Check yourself before you wreck yourself please. Your summer weather clothes might be a good deal thinner and lighter than your winter clothes, and they may show every lump, pump, and underpinning. Do yourself a favor and check out all your angles before you leave the house, no one can pull off a visible panty line, no one.
Regardless of the season, dressing for work is mostly common sense, which we all have, so let’s use it, ok? I mean deep down we all know a white eyelet romper isn’t work-wear, right? Oh and one last thing, paint your GD toes if you’re going to be exposing them! Paleo diets may be in, but paleo toes are totally gross.